Founder of Alminah Hope, a non-governmental organisation that caters for widows, Mrs. Hope Okoli-Nwakwesi, has said people should stop victimising widows as the condition was not a curse.
Speaking at a seminar organised for widows by another widowhood organisation, Dreamfo, she also admonished widows not to ‘celebrate’ the condition as it was not a club.
The speaker, who said she had been a widow for over 20 years said; “being a widow is not a curse. Widowhood is not a taboo. A widow should not be victimised, segregated or made to disappear.”
According to her, there was a need to demystify widowhood.
Mrs. Okoli-Nwakesi advised widows not be lazy or acquire an entitlement mentality as nobody owed them anything. She also advised them against self pity or seeking pity from others.
“Set your priorities right. Maintain your integrity. Do whatever you can to take care of yourself andyour children, but don’t prostitute. It is not easy, but it can be done,” she encouraged them as she shared her own struggles to raise four children after being widowed in her twenties and losing her job a few months after her husband’s funeral.
Also speaking at the event, Mrs. Ayo Yemisi Jaiyeola, further reiterated the need for widows to work extra hard given that they had to shoulder the responsibilities of two people.
Jaiyeola, founder of Serendipity home for widows said; “Don’t just seat and wait to be pitied. Find out what you are good at and do it. Don’t wait for handout. Seek multiple streams of income.”
She lamented that widows do not like themselves and therefore do not assist each other.
She encouraged them to start off ‘widows’ groups’ on their streets and be each other’s keepers stressing that there was no need for competition among widows.
“Adjust from nothing to something, from zero character to hero character,” Jaiyeola told the widows.
Mrs. Iruoma Chinedum Ofortube, founder of Thyroid Awareness & Support Initiative, TASI, who gave a health talk on hyperthyroidism, urged the women to pay attention to their health because they need to be in good health to take care of their responsibilities.
“If your inside is not in order, if you are not well, you cannot put food on the table for yourself and your children,” she said.
Ofortube described thyroid disorder as a medical condition affecting the function of the thyroid gland. She noted that 1.6 billion people worldwide were at risk of thyroid disorders with about 750 million people living with various kinds of thyroid condition.
She further noted that 60% of those living with the disease were undiagnosed while 70% of those suffering from the disease were women.
She pointed out that there were different types of thyroid disorder and listed some of the symptoms of the disease as; unexplained weight loss or excessive weight gain, rapid heartbeat, bulging eyes, high blood pressure, mood swings, cold intolerance, constipation or frequent bowl movement, insomnia, brain, fog decreased libido, scanty menstruation and hair loss among others.
According to her, the disease may also not present with physical symptoms. She therefore urged the women not to hesitate in seeking medical help if they notice anything wrong. “If you notice anything wrong, worry about it, pray about, but seek proper medical attention,” she said.
Earlier in her welcome remarks, the founder of Dreamfo the organisers of the seminar, Mrs. Olubunmi Afolabi, urged widows not to see their condition as the end of their life noting that time makes a difference.
She stressed that “widows can be whole again no matter the challenges facing us.”
The seminar was tagged, “I Can Be Whole Again.”
